Pterodactyl in my dining room!!!

There is a great big Pterodactyl in my house!  I want to eat it!  And I will.

Mommy said it is a dragonfly and she is trying to get it to go outside.

Pterodactyl Watch

I know for a fact that it is not a dragonfly.  I am a dragon and I can’t fly.  If any dragon in the whole wide world could fly it would be me because I am extraordinary and I work very hard at doing everything.  I tried to fly about a year ago and I had to go to the Exotic Animal Hospital in Tempe, AZ not once but twice.  That is why I have a hard time with one of my legs.  So dragons not only don’t fly, but we don’t even have wings.

I looked in Google to make sure I identified this tasty (I hope) creature.  I typed in flying, long thin body, very long wings and delicious.  It came up with Pterodactyl, so that is what it is.

We need to catch it right away before I become friends with it.  I can’t eat my friends.  It has been living in our dining room ceiling fan for almost 2 days.  I stay really still and it comes out of the ceiling fan and start flying around, but I can’t seem to get near it.  If nothing else – it is 93% fascinating and 7% annoying.

 

Trying to catch this Pterodactyl requires more patience than I thought.  It better be delicious.
Trying to catch this Pterodactyl requires more patience than I thought. It better be delicious.

Earth-shattering Revelation!

I just learned where food comes from.  Brace yourself:  It comes out of the dirt!  I’m not joking! Mommy took me outside to see the long skinny buckets that she filled with dirt last month.  There were green things coming out of them!  Can you believe it???

Then she picked me up and put me in the dirt bucket and let me eat as much as I wanted.  It is so yummy.  There were white flowers all over the place and I ate them all!!!!!   No matter how much I ate, there was more everywhere I looked.  Buckets and buckets of food.  After I eat all the tops off one bucket, I go to the next one and eat more.

I wonder if everyone knows that food comes right out of a dirt bucket.  And Mommy makes such a big deal about turning on the oven during the summer.

Healthy food for dragons.  No iron.
Healthy food for dragons. No iron.

Scum – In General

Scum Free Big Sink
Scum Free Big Sink

From what I understand, in general, there are 3 kinds of scum and they are all icky.

  1. Soap Scum.  Mommy doesn’t like soap scum so she gets a grapefruit from the tree in the backyard and scrubs the big sink with it before I get a bath.  Mommy complains about the grapefruit, soap, scum and sink for 20 minutes and my bath only takes 2 minutes.  The rest of my bath time is spent drinking my bath water, soaking, swimming and relaxing.  In my opinion if Mommy doesn’t like the soap scum she should quit using soap.
  2. Pond Scum.  Not sure what the big deal is with pond scum, we don’t even have a pond, but apparently ‘Pond Scum’ is a verb used to describe anyone who has ever dated Aunt Fancy.
  3. Scum-of-the-Earth.  This is complicated.  ‘Scum-of-the-Earth’ is a term used to describe people who make promises and then they don’t follow up on those.  Mostly politicians.  (I am going to run for Congress someday and I won’t make any promises so that I don’t worry about keeping them)

My new blankie

Aunt Fancy finally left.  She brought presents.  Stevie got a new hiding cave, Mommy got a new dress, I got a brand new blankie with oodles of pockets all over it.

This is like my favorite Aunt Fancy present ever!  You have to understand my relationship with my blankies.  There is a law that states that all dragons have to sit under a UVA and UVB light for about 10 hours a day.  I hate my light and Mommy feels bad that I have to do it, but it’s the law and Mommy is all about the law.  As soon as dragons are allowed to run for Congress, I am going to get elected and change that law.

Anyway, the only way that I can tolerate sitting under the light is to have my head covered.  The problem is that if I move out from under the blankie I can’t get back under there, so I sneak out from under the UVB light and Mommy flips out.  With this new blankie, I can get out of one pocket and scoot into another.  I will send pictures as soon as Mommy takes some.  For now, here is 2 pictures of my other blankies.  I really do hate that light.

from phone 657 from phone 987